wanting Endopendence

Poem from a fellow endo sister:

Feeling so alone,
worthless and unloved.
What did I do to deserve all this
… I ask the one above.

I cannot take more pain,
It’s broken me inside,
I feel like I’m going insane,
I wish that I could hide…

It’s digging in just like a knife,
Sucking my body dry,
What point is there to my life,
I just break down and cry.

You told me I’d get better,
You told me I’d be fine.
You never told me I’d feel this way,
I just want back what’s mine!

To play with my children,
To be a proper wife,
To feel him deep inside me,
Without worry, pain or strife.

Why can’t I be normal,
I haven’t been that bad,
So please god I’m begging you,
Stop making me so sad.

The thoughts are getting nearer,
I’m trying to fight them back,
But you keep on pushing me to my limit,
My guard is getting slack.

I don’t like all these voices
That keep telling me I’m wrong,
I know I can be happy again
And sing those happy songs.

So now it’s time to just let go,
Stop being so uptight,
And as my eyes begin to close,
With love, god bless, goodnight…See more

myendojourney